Bambi`s Retirement Resort

Miyajima - September 24th

Took the ferry over to the island of Miyajima – one of Japan`s “3 Most Beautiful Spots”. It really was amazing, especially considering we were greeted by wild deer that would eat paper and clothing if you let them. I let one of them have a lick of my ice cream, and it got all over his nose! I swear these deer have no table manners! It was hellacute though.

The island is famous for the Itsukushima Shrine and O-Torii, which were both built in the late 6th Century on the water, so when the tide is in, the Torii looks as though its floating.

In the afternoon we took a 2 hour hike up Mt. Misen, 530m above sea level. No monkeys were spotted this time, but I couldn`t help but feel that we were being watched by something…or someone…By the time we reached it to the summit, the view was amazing! It was totally worth the leg and ass cramps. How did the deer get all the way up here with a diet comprised of newspaper, some kids`s shorts and icecream, I wondered?

How I Learned to Stop Worrying...

Hiroshima – September 23rd-25th

Our hostal was only a few blocks away from the Peace Park, Memorial Museum, and A-Bomb Dome. The Peace Park, once a bustling and prosperous entertainment district before the war, was leveled completely and it was thought unlikely that any plant life could grow in its ashes.

The Memorial Museum houses hundreds of artifacts – fused bottles, twisted metals, clothes burnt and soiled by the black dust that filled the air. The stories of the survivors were so powerful、although I have to say that the story of Sadako and the thousand paper cranes was the most heartbreaking.

At the south end of the Peace Park is the A-Bomb Dome, which was once Hiroshima`s Prefectural Products Exhibition Hall. The dilapidated structure was one of the only that remained after the bombing, and has since been declared a World Heritage Site. Believe me when I say that the photo does not do it justice.

On a lighter note, the restaurants and nightlife in Hiroshima are fantastic. We had dinner at this famous 3-floor okonomiyake place, then headed to a gaigin bar to meet up with some friends, then drank some Ichiban Number 1 Asahi Super Dry in the alley around 1 am, then hit the karaoke bar from some late night David Bowie baby, yeah!

Sea Monkeys!

Beppu City – September 19th

Headed for Beppu that same night. You could see the reminence of paint chips along the road barriers from the bruised and battered cars foolishly driving at high speeds as we winded up and down the mountains through the fog. Arrived late that night and experienced major issues finding a proper hotel for the night since Monday was a holiday. Mental Note: Reservations are key during public holidays.

The next day we went to the Umitamago Aquarium. Stroked the stingrays, picked up the sharks, fell in love with the sea otters and watched a walrus perform tricks for the Japanese tourists. Later went to the Macaque Sanctuary, which is home to over 1,200 monkeys! When one of them got into a brawl over food he ran straight for my legs and dodged around them. He screamed. I screamed. So would you if you saw “28 Days Later”! He could have been infected with rage, dammit!

Road Trippin`

Mount Aso National park – September 18th

With Sports Day over, I decided it was time to get tha funk out of Shiota! Outside of Fukuoka City, we noticed a sign that said “Aso – 137 km”, and an executive decision was made to head in that general direction. Once we had arrived at Mt. Aso, we hopped on the 50 year-old ropeway and headed up towards the smoking caldera.

The tourist pamphlet reads like this:
(Please read with deep voice for additional effect)
“The five peaks of Aso rise from the center of the world`s largest caldera – 18 kilometers in diameter from east to west, 24 kilometers north to south; 128 kilometers in circumference. The five peaks include the active Nakadake volcanic crater, the ancient crater of Kijimadake, and the snaggle-toothed summit of Nekodake. The crater of Nakadake peak smokes and rumbles in constant activity. Surrounding the crater`s edge is seen the striped and coloured earth of lava and sulfurous minerals.”
Now how mother f$&%#`n crazy is that?

Once the day came to an end, another executive decision was made to turn right instead of left through the misty mountaintops of the park. Thanks be to iPod for playing Led Zepplin! Off to the side of the road, nestled between rolling green hills and a small lake, we noticed something that warranted a pull-over: wild horses were grazing and being fondled by tourists. I have to admit that I was also one of those tourists.

Track and Field Day?

Shiota Junior High School, Sports Festival – September 17th

A typical Sports Festival for Japanese schools includes the following events:

Running, Running, and more Running
You name it, every kid in the school ran it. 100 and 400 metre Dashes and Relays, 3200 metre Long Distance, Obstacle Courses – wait a second, I don`t remember this event in Canada...Whatever happened to the Hurdles? The Long and High Jumps? The Shot Put???

Dancing and Cheering
I thought to myself: “The what and the what now? How can these possibly be classified as events? Am I reliving Frosh Week without the mind-altering substances? Well, the outfits are pretty flashy!”


Q: Were you involved in the Events?
A: Unfortunately, yes. I was weasled into racing in this obstacle course by my Kocho Sensei (Vice Principal). At first I thought, “Yeah dude, I`m gonna kick ass!”, and then they lined me up beside a group of 14 and 15 year old hormone raging BOYS!! I mean, I couldn`t even beat hormone raging boys when I was 14, and let`s just say for the record that I`m a wee bit older and not as fast as I used to be. I am Jayne`s absolute sense of embarrassment. The only thing that could have made it worse was if it was on videotape – oh wait, IT IS!!!!!

6 Little Puppies and a Kiwi Fruit

Adam`s story goes something like this: While walking his bike up a steep hill on his way back to school, he found 6 newborn puppies tossed alongside the road in a garbage heap. Is this normal in inaka Japan, I wonder?

Adam decided that he could not leave the puppies in the dirt, so he packed them gently into his backpack and rode them back to school. Once the teachers and students witnessed what Adam had discovered, a call was immediately made to the nearest animal shelter that would collect the puppies the next day. The teachers then decided it best to each take one puppy home for the night. Adam was one of those teachers.

So when I received a text message that read “I`m not kidding, I found these puppies in a rubbish bin”, I had to see it for myself. Adam gave the puppy, which he has since called Homestar Runner, a bath and some milk administered with a Hello Kitty toy medical kit. The eyedropper from the kit was the only thing that could fit into little Homestar`s mouth. She was barely the size of my palm. She whimpered a lot, sniffed around to make sure I smelled friendly, and then snuggled into my shirt to take a long nap. I definitely had one of those “Aww, Adam can we keep her? PLEASE?!?!” moments.